Breath and Release

So I can pretty much say, that this so-called relationship of four years is OVER!!!!

I mean yea its been ruff and we've had our up and downs and now I'm looking back at these for years and just have to let it all go... Its hard to think that at twenty eight I'll be single again. When I was younger and thought about my future it was always I'll have a career, a steady job a good relationship maybe even kids. Well life sure has a funny way of fucking up my plans.

When I got into this relationship, I wasn't even expecting to find someone to fall in love with. Well again life threw me a curve call and I fell right on my face, head over heels for this guy, when in the end he did me wrong, broke my heart and just thought it would be ok for us to work things out, like if nothing had happened. Like if he never cheated, never made me question the fact that he loved me at any point in the relationship. I found myself questioning it all the time, if he even ever loved me at all.

But what's done is done now. I don't have regrets, I've learned from our relationship what to do right in my next one. Not to let myself fall for a guy so fast, You'd think I'd learn by now right, wrong. Yes its going to be hard, not having you in my life, but your bad for me. I'm much more happier now that you don't call. I've realized that I was blind to the fact that you were in this for your convenience. I was your girlfriend when it was convenient for you, when u needed me I was there, when u wanted something who did you call on Me and when I needed or wanted something you couldn't be there. Always had a excuses. I hope that in your next relationship you don't have excuses, I hope that you keep it one hundred with your girl. Like you've always told me to do.. So I'm keep it one hundred with you now.. Yea I loved you and did anything I could to make you happy, birthdays, anniversaries, shit like that who was the one that got spoiled, not me. Let alot of things go to avoid fights, but there comes a point where you just cant take it and you just break, and I've reached my breaking point a long time ago.

Now that I'm let all this out I can take a deep breath and release you and all of my feelings I have for you.

So I'm gonna keep my head up high and not look back, I'm letting you and your excuses go...

I wish you well in all you do and whoever you end up with, because I'm not a hateful person. You'll be fine with out me. Your doing good, you haven't called me so I guess you've found a new fool....